You see? I am so weak.
Since my last post, I have been so tempted to write in this space. But I really, really, didn’t want to ruin what I saw as closure. ...A nice neat package of a travel journal. But I felt the pull. It called to me when the kids started the school year in fabulous fashion. Then it begged me to post at the equinox, as fall is my favorite. Again as we came to Samhain. (Now that I’ve been to Ireland I can pretentiously name-drop, right? Go back to Halloween’s roots, as it were?)
I thought I could post little things on Facebook, and be satisfied. The FB is great for letting me keep in touch with those who I care about, but it has its limits. It’s small-talk and chit-chat. Great. But often for me, making small-talk is difficult. We introverts like to go deep. If you’re an introvert, you know exactly what I’m talking about. If you’re an extrovert, you now think I am mental.
So, yeah, I enjoyed writing this little blog more than I anticipated - and I have had such supportive feedback from people who have read it, that I have convinced myself I could write more entries. The trouble is that I am back in real life. It is one thing to make my dry observations while traveling, but I think it is altogether different to turn my gaze toward the events that fill my daily life.
For one, it is unexceptional; which is not to be confused with boring. I just mean that I don’t think the things that occur in my life are fascinating to others. And actually, the loss of privacy concerns me. Two, I am opinionated and probably too blunt for my own good… I over-share; I ask pointed questions. I am terrified that my efforts at being diplomatic would fail and I would then alienate people I care about – family, friends and neighbors. And a big issue is: What is the point of the blog? If it stayed a travel blog, fine. If only I could make a living out of traveling and being witty – that would suit me. But I don’t want to run with a particular topic and become its champion. Then it becomes the thing that defines you – and nobody is that one-dimensional.
But then, maybe it would be fun. And maybe it would cause me to write about things others would enjoy. I may lead an unexceptional daily existence, but the experiences that brought me here are far from ordinary. If I can communicate that in a humorous and entertaining and manner, then I would be very pleased. I will try not to fuck it up, and also, not to swear so much.
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